Sakamoto Girl: 02

I wrote this story while listening to Sakamoto–one of my favorite contemporary musicians; he’s right up there with Beethoven, Debussy and Chopin for me–, so I highly recommend that you do so. For the first two chapters I primarily listened to Energy Flow, so click the link below if you’d like to listen. :D

Read the first part of Sakamoto Girl here.

Play Energy Flow

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02: Back to the Basics

I heard the sound of her knock on the door even before her knuckles made contact with wood. “Coming,” I said as I quickly went to open the door.

There she was, her bright red hair vibrantly standing out against the pale cream colors of the hotel walls. She raised her right hand in recognition of me and quickly let herself inside my room. She looked around, her lips pursed as she took in the finer details of the hotel’s interior.

“Were you hoping for a presidential suite?” I joked. She shook her head without saying anything while she studied a painting hanging near the couch.

“Do you want something to eat?” I offered her. I wiped my sweaty palms on my pants; I had never noticed before that I have sweaty palms. She looked at me curiously and smiled.

“You look so nervous,” she said as she took a few steps toward me. Placing her hands on my shoulders, she gently whispered, “relax…it’s just me.” Hearing her say those words made me shudder and more nervous than I was a minute ago. I cleared my throat and looked away, and as I did, she removed her hands from my shoulders and clasped them behind her back.

“Do you—ahem—want to eat anything?” I asked yet again. The hotel room became even smaller with two people around. It didn’t help much that any room with only her and I would become too filled, too small, too enclosed.

She suddenly looked at me with bright eyes, and for a moment I thought she was hungry. But one moment later she would be occupied with fishing something out of her bag. I merely watched her as she rummaged through her worn messenger bag, waiting for another one of her surprises. No matter what she did, she could never stop surprising me.

“Here it is!” She exclaimed. She took out a CD case and handed it to me. I looked at it briefly and tried my best not to roll my eyes at her.

“I’ll lend you my copy for now. You seriously need a dose of Sakamoto, really.”

I sighed and looked at the cheery redhead who was currently looking inside the refrigerator. I really couldn’t understand her and her utter liking of—no, more like intense obsession with—this Sakamoto. I really couldn’t see what the fuss was about.

She must’ve sensed what I was thinking because not a moment later she said, “Listen once—just once—and I swear you’ll love him just as much as I do.”

“I’m not gay,” I joked, which made her snicker.

“You know what I mean,” she said in a serious voice. “Oh, and take care of my CD. I’ll get it back after two days, so be sure to make good use of your days with my precious CD.”

“Yes, mother.” I felt her slap me on the arm. We both laughed afterwards.

We ate a hearty meal together and watched a bit of TV together. I didn’t know much French, and because she claimed she was particularly gifted with the language, translated into Korean what we were watching. Some of her translations were somewhat ridiculous, but I couldn’t tell if she was kidding or not; she looked completely serious as she said in Korean what was being said on the television.

I couldn’t remember much that happened after that—I knew we dozed off for awhile and then she woke me up. She said she needed to go; she still had something to do.

“Don’t forget to listen to Sakamoto. Two days—remember!” She said as she was in the hallway. She was walking backwards, facing me with a big cheery wave. I nodded and waved goodbye.

I closed the door and turned towards the ‘living room’ of my hotel room, back to where the Sakamoto CD lay.

*

“You can put that box over there,” I said to Geng, a friend of mine who was helping me move to my new place. I carried a few things myself and placed them by the window. I asked him if he wanted anything to drink.

“A glass of cold water would be nice,” he said in his broken Korean. Until now, after many years of living in Korea, he still hasn’t fully grasped the language…or maybe I was only picking on him after the many times he picked on my Chinese.

I opened the refrigerator and took out an unopened bottle of water and threw it in his direction. With the flair only Geng could have, he successfully caught the bottle and twisted the cap open.

“Thanks, by the way,” I said to him as he chugged down the contents of the bottle. Because the elevator of the building was being repaired, we had no choice but to walk from the first floor to the fifth floor, where my new apartment was, resulting in quite a bit of an exercise. That was the reason I asked Geng out of all my friends to help—he was the least likely to complain…even if he did, it would only be in a joking kind of way.

“You’re treating me to dinner, remember?” He said as he sat on a dining chair.

I made a face at him. “I never agreed to it.”

“Oh, but I already did my part, so you should, too. It’s only natural—or else I’ll tell your fia—”

“Fine, fine,” I quickly droned. He grinned at me.

I looked outside the window and murmured, “I can’t believe you still remember…”

“Huh?” I heard Geng say. “Remember what?”

I turned and looked at Geng curiously. “Didn’t you just threaten me that you’d—”

“—tell her that you’re being mean to your friend, yes. And I never thought my threat would actually work,” laughed Geng. I frowned at him.

“Being mean at you? That was your threat?”

Geng nodded and raised an eyebrow. “What did you think my threat would be?”

I quickly looked away; for a moment I saw a blur of red that must’ve been a trick of the light. “Nothing. Just me…over-thinking things.”

I turned back to Geng and tried to change the subject. “Hey, while you’re here, you should help me arrange stuff a bit until…you know, she comes,” I said. He nodded and took a few things out of the boxes. Before long, we were both putting books into shelves and plates into the cupboards. We were so busy putting stuff out that both of us weren’t talking, until Geng spoke.

“Hmm…you have this CD?” I looked at Geng, who was holding up a CD case with a white cover jacket. It didn’t take me long to recognize what CD it was—even if he held it from a distance, I could easily tell. It was something that would be embedded into my mind for a long time.

“Oh…that. It’s kind of cool—I gave it a try and it wasn’t half bad.”

“Really?” He asked, looking at the back cover and then opening the case. “I’ll borrow it, then—”

NO!” I shouted. I quickly moved in front of him and snatched the CD away. Geng looked at me, obviously surprised at my reaction.

I looked at the CD in my hand, and I could feel my grip getting tighter and tighter until my fingernails rubbed against the hard plastic CD case.

“Siwon…I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was important to you.”

“It’s alright,” I softly said. I apologized to Geng as I placed the CD on top of a book shelf and went back to arranging my things. It took twenty more minutes and then we were finished with only the bare minimum to make things look a wee bit tidier. As he was about to leave, I thanked Geng once again and promised to treat him sometime.

I closed the door and sighed. Quickly, as if I were in a hurry, as if I were scared that it might’ve been lost or stolen, I took the Sakamoto CD from the shelf and opened the case. Before I knew what I was doing, the gentle sounds of Energy Flow could be heard inside the small room of my new apartment. I closed my eyes as I sat down.

“Listen once—just once—and I swear you’ll love him just as much as I do.”

No, until that moment I still couldn’t understand what it was about the Japanese musician that she loved. But she wasn’t completely off the mark, though.

It took me just once.

One listen—it took me just one—and I loved her just as much as she loved her Sakamoto.

Sakamoto Girl: 00-01

Written while listening to Ryuichi Sakamoto–I absolutely love him and his works. This story has been sitting in my computer for months now, waiting to be finished by me. This is the first non-one-shot I’m posting here at Epik Love Story…I’ve been debating on whether to actually post this online or not even before it’s finished. Guess you know which side won. :D

00. What He Remembers

Brown eyes with flecks of grey.
Red flaming hair—hair that she herself dyed—just above her shoulders.
A voice so melodic it can easily put me to sleep.

That’s how I remember her. Sakamoto Girl.
I’ve been haunted by those eyes, that wonderful voice for so long that I don’t know how I was able to live life before her, not knowing somewhere in this world she could exist. Life as I knew it ended from the moment I met her, and never again would it be the same.

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01: Sakamoto

It started with a question about Sakamoto.

I was sitting outside a café somewhere in Paris, my attention buried under a non-fiction book a friend gave me. It wasn’t what you would call a very interesting book, but I took it upon myself to finish it—I who had never finished an entire non-fiction book of my own will. Although it wasn’t exactly thought-provoking, I tried my best to focus at the task, and so I must have withdrawn all my other senses: the coffee I bought became tasteless after a few sips, the buzz of the crowd unheard after a few pages, even my own skin felt numb, unfeeling of the rare breeze that went by the streets of Paris.

She said it took her a few tries before she caught my attention.

“What a relief,” she said after I gave her a look of curiosity. She wiped some imaginary sweat from her forehead and continued, “I thought for a while you couldn’t hear me.”

She spoke in my native language—Korean—but at first glance you would never mistake her for one. Her cropped hair was dyed bright red, the color of her eyes were the lightest brown with flecks of grey. I don’t know how I realized that she was Korean, but after awhile it just dawned upon me. Perhaps it was the shape of her eyes, or maybe her skin…until now I don’t really know. I just…happened to know.

She was smiling like a kid as I said one word: pardon? Her eyes suddenly brightened and she repeated herself.

“Do you like Sakamoto?”

I blinked a couple of times as I let her words sink in. It was a question that took me by surprise.

“Who’s Sakamoto?” I asked innocently. She laughed.

“Ryuichi Sakamoto. Only the best living musician in the world.”

I wasn’t really someone who was knowledgeable about the musical world, but I was curious. Closing the book I had, I faced her once again, my eyes telling her to go on with her story. If I knew then what it would mean to me, how that very random conversation with the very odd girl would affect me, I would have stood up with the book in my hand, leaving that young woman and her Sakamoto world. But I didn’t know, and so I listened.

I listened as she shared tidbits of information about the so-called best living musician in the world. Her eyes sparkled at every word, at every thought. It was deeply amusing to watch her. We talked for hours and hours—mostly she did the talking and I listened, but it was deeply interesting, listening to her talk. She has this musical voice, a kind of melodic tune whenever she talked about things that fascinated her. I assumed she was a singer or a musician of sorts, but when I asked, she said she wasn’t even close to being one.

“I don’t even know how to read a music sheet, let alone sing. I’m tone deaf,” she said. After a small pause, she went back to telling me about Sakamoto.

My first memories of her went that way. Me, listening to her melodic voice, her chattering about a musician she loved yet I had never even heard of. I don’t remember much of what she said—I don’t think I even listened well enough to remember her words. All I could remember was the sound of her voice…soothing and rhythmic, like a child’s lullaby. It put me at ease, listening to her speak.

We bade goodbye to each other an hour after the sky went dark. She said she had fun talking to me. “I hadn’t spoken with a fellow Korean for so long; it feels so nice to talk to you.” I smiled at her, gave a slight bow and went on my way. It wasn’t after three blocks of slowly walking to my hotel did I remember—I never got her name.

It didn’t bother me, of course. She wasn’t someone I’d really want to go and meet with, anyway. I found her rather strange—who would, after all, come up to a stranger in a fine afternoon, asking about liking a random musician or not? It felt all too confusing for me, so as I walked to my hotel I tried to take away all memories of that conversation. Thinking too much about it would only cost me a headache.

However, as I closed the door of my room inside the small hotel, the faint traces of her voice still lingered in my ears, like the voice of a ghost inside a haunted, lonely house.

“Do you like Sakamoto?” the voice asked.

*

I was seated inside a restaurant in bustling Seoul, my fingers constantly tapping the wooden table in front of me, the usual sign of boredom. As a certain pair of eyes wandered to my tapping fingers, I consciously stopped in mid-action and slowly placed my fingers around the silver fork on my plate. I smiled at the young woman in front of me, and she continued with her blabbering. It was at this time that the sound of her voice would automatically be tuned out of my mind, as if I were turning the volume dial of the radio into low. She didn’t seem to notice that I would do this every time she opened her mouth; I only uttered a few words to politely convey that I was listening—a simple “ah” or “hmm” seemed to put her at ease.

Her voice was low and unpleasant, and I hated it. Of course, I couldn’t tell her. Like the many women I had dated before, hers wasn’t the voice I wanted to hear. But this wasn’t a good enough reason for anyone to stop from seeing her—how could I tell my friends that I didn’t want to date so-and-so just because her voice wasn’t appealing enough to me? Just the mere thought of explaining to anyone about my habit of “fading away” from the words spoken and just listening to the voice and tune of the speaker was absurd. And because they all wanted me to get married soon, they pushed me into meeting all kinds of women for the sad purpose of marriage.

…But every single one of the women I met did not have that voice—a melodic voice similar to hers. A voice that would make me want to curl into her lap and sleep. A voice so hauntingly beautiful it pained to be apart from it. A voice I could hear anywhere, like the faint whispers of a ghost, but couldn’t sense where it was coming from.

“Siwon-ssi?” the woman in front of me said. My name felt foreign, coming from her voice and lips. I quickly looked up and apologized. “It’s been hectic at work, you see,” I lied. She ate the lie and pursued to ask about my profession. I answered curtly and didn’t say anymore, so she went on to another one of her entirely long stories, which I drowned out again. In my world, I could only visualize that time in Paris. The young woman with bright eyes, those long hours of conversation…

Most importantly, I could remember her voice.

Without a moment to spare, I blurted out to the woman in front of me: “Do you like Sakamoto?”

The woman in front of me blinked twice, as I had in Paris.

“Is that a fashion brand, like Vera?”

“Vera?” It was my turn to blink.

“You know, Vera Wang—I’ve always loved her gowns, she never fails to impress me—” And she went on and on, my question left hanging in midair, abandoned and unanswered.

A few minutes passed. The minutes soon turned to an hour—then an hour and a half. I cleared my throat and apologized once more. “I have pressing work to do, I’m sorry.” I called the waiter, paid for the meal, quickly stood up and left.

As I walked to my car, I smiled to myself and remembered my question. Who was I kidding? Even if she knew Sakamoto and loved him, she didn’t have a voice like hers. Or even if she did, she wouldn’t be the same person. Those light brown eyes weren’t hers, nor was her hair short and dyed a bright shade of red.

She wasn’t the girl in Paris.

I could hear the voice—her voice—once again. It was only a voice I remembered, not one I could really hear from anyone around, but to me it sounded so much more real than any voice I heard in a while.

“Do you like Sakamoto?”

If I did, I asked the voice, will you stay with me forever?